If there is anything we love to do in our Sapphic community it's to put ourselves into various discrete lesbian categories. Butch, femme, chapstick, lipstick, baby dykes, gold stars, hey mamas and yes, ninja lesbians. The list goes on.
But let’s talk about that last one. What the heck is a ninja lesbian — despite sounding really cool? Maybe you've seen it pop up on TikTok, or had someone include it on their HER bio, or even called you one. If you’re confused, no worries. Here’s the tea with ninja lesbians.
What is a ninja lesbian?
So what are these lesbians of myth and mystery known as the “ninja lesbian”? Quite simply, according to Urban Dictionary, ninja lesbians are queer women who “look completely straight until WA-BAM, she's checking out your boobs and listening to Melissa Etheridge.”
In other, less dude-bro terms, ninja lesbians are usually high femme Sapphics whose personal style and aesthetics are such that they can go stealth and blend in with straight culture.
That makes sense, right?
How was the term "ninja lesbian" popularized?
While the exact origin of the term has been to the sands of time and algorithms of the internet, the popularity of the term surged last year following an episode of the I’ve Had It podcast which discussed the existence of ninja lesbians.
In the Feb. 23, 2023 episode entitled, appropriately, “Ninja Lesbians,” hosts Jennifer Welch and Angie "Pumps" Sullivan discuss a message they receive from a listener named Tammy M who has called in to say that she has “had it” with straight people appropriating the term “partner.”
Tammy M goes on to explain that her partner is a ninja lesbian, “super feminine so she walks amongst the straights completely undetected.” Tammy M is frustrated because her partner is constantly being disappointed by the experience of meeting other women who she wrongly assumes are also ninja lesbians when they refer to their significant other as their partner, only to reveal they're a dude. (Cue the *whomp whomp* sound effect). Both the hosts heartily agree with Tammy’s opinion that “partner” should be the sole property of the LGBTQ+ community, then talk excitedly about the existence of ninja lesbians.
@ivehaditpodcast
Here’s how social media has reacted to the term "ninja lesbian".
As always social media had a ton of fun with the term. Keep scrolling to see some of our faves.
@allypie118 The term ninja lesbian has me rolling 😂 #fyp #lgbt🌈 #wlw #comedy #ninjalesbians #femlesbian
@tressa_amico I love the new terms we create #wlw #single #lesbiandating #lesbiansoftiktok #ninjalesbian #lgbtq #tallfemme #gaygirls #gay
@livandkelly Especially us late-in-lifers! 😂🏳️🌈 #jokes #fyp #wlw #lateinlifelesbian🏳️🌈 #lesbiansoftiktok #lesbiantiktok #lgbtq #pridemonth #latebloominglesbian #femmesoftiktok #ninjalesbian🥷🏳️🌈
@annamsutter #ninjalesbians #lesbiansoftiktok🌈