RuPaul's Drag Race star Lexi Love almost blew up her relationship because of a sudden relapse, but after a stint in rehab and efforts to work on herself, the drag queen is finally ready for love.
Earlier this week, Lexi announced her engagement to partner Jay Groff with a sweet Instagram post, but the pair almost didn’t make it to a proposal because of her struggles with an addiction to cocaine.
“We talked about getting together and marrying each other, but he was very adamant that he wanted to take a lot more time or that I had to prove myself and my love for him or dedication to sobriety before he would even consider something so serious,” Lexi tells PRIDE.
Lexi announced last month that she was entering rehab to deal with her substance abuse issues and mental health. This was after Groff had broken up with her because she “was a mess” and he needed her to get clean and get her life in order before he would commit to her.
Lexi started using cocaine to stay awake because her performing and traveling schedule had gotten so intense, but the problem only snowballed from there. Going on Drag Race was a dream come true for the drag queen, and her “nose and body” thanked her for being forced to stop snorting cocaine while filming or risk getting kicked off the show.
“So that was a 43-day break. I had the best little forced sobriety,” Lexi says, calling it her own “little wellness retreat.”
But once filming was over, her drug problem that she had managed to hide — even from her Drag Race cast mates —continued to get worse, and she started using every day.
“It was a little problem, let’s say, in the background, and once the full-fledged reality of touring and I think just like the success overnight, really kind of carried me away into that lifestyle to where it was just everyday, and I had no control over it whatsoever,” she admits.
For a moment, it looked like the pair wouldn’t reunite when things went badly at rehab and Lexi had to leave early. The facility she was at wasn’t providing the services they promised, didn’t educate the staff on the LGBTQ+ community, and began treating her differently from the cisgender women who were also patients there. So, to preserve her mental health, Lexi checked herself out.
“They weren’t prepared for Lexi Love, darling,” she quips before taking on a serious tone. “It just got to me at a certain point. Everybody has their breaking point.”
Luckily, Lexi has been able to preserve her sobriety outside of rehab and put in the work to get her life in order. Groff never stopped calling and texting, even when Lexi was in rehab, so the two got back together and mutually decided to propose to each other less than a month later.
They celebrated their engagement with close friends and family in Cynthiana, Kentucky, the state they are both from. “We just decided we weren’t going to do a normal engagement, so that’s why there’s not like an on-the-knee photo like there would be for a regular heterosexual wedding. I don’t know, we just felt like being unique,” she explains.
Their whirlwind romance began when they met last Halloween at a party where Lexi was performing. Groff, who was wearing a Chucky costume, caught her eye, and Lexi told him she would find him at the end of the night. “That’s usually my hint that I want them to find me,” and Groff did!
The lovebirds have plans to tie the knot next year during Pride Month once Lexi has remained clean for a full year. While Groff would love to have a small, intimate ceremony at the courthouse, Lexi has dreams of a big, lavish wedding.
Lexi says she wants a wedding where her fellow queens from Drag Race attend. However, her real dream is to have a RuGirl double wedding with Kori King and Lydia B. Kollins (who fell in love on Lexi’s season of the show).
“I want to have a Butt King/Love wedding and Suzie Toot is the entertainment and I was Sasha Colby to officiate,” Lexi says.
Now that Lexi is doing better and the pair have settled into life as a couple, Groff, a trans man and a vet tech, has decided to retire and become a “stay-at-home dog dad.” The pair is adopting a new puppy on Monday and will travel the country together with their other pets while Lexi tours.
“Life is so beautiful,” she says. “I forget that and I think that RuPaul’s Drag Race was brought in to my life not for the fame or the success, but it was actually brought into my life to give me a reason to get clean and stay clean and actually enjoy what real life is and just to have somebody that gets me and that sees me.”